Wrestlemania 2010

It's that time of year again... the time where I come out and admit - yes, I still watch professional wrestling. If you don't enjoy watching oiled up steroid using guys and gals pretending to beat each other up for your entertainment, I submit that something is wrong with YOU, not I.

Anyways, last year, Wrestlemania 25 took place in Houston, TX. Though I had recently left H-town, I somehow was still in town that weekend, and ended up attending with 3 friends of mine. Good seats too. It was a cool experience, but the show fell flat from some of the better Wrestlemanias like 14, 18, 19, and even 20.

There was one match, however, that not only saved the show, but took its place in Wrestlemania lore among the all-time classic battles in wrestling history - "The Heartbreak Kid" Shawn Michaels vs The Undertaker.

This match was so good, we should've left afterwards. They should've found a way to put one of the title belts on one of the two homestate Texans so the match could have gone last, avoiding the this-shouldnt-have-happened scenario of a weak Triple H - Randy Orton match closing the show. I believe we left mid-match and heard the end as we descended the escalators of Reliant Stadium.

Well, the WWE is nothing if not consistent, and the best time to watch wrestling is now - January until April. It starts with the buildup to the Royal Rumble, which naturally flows into the "Road to Wrestlemania", given the fact that the Royal Rumble winner gets a title shot at the big dance.

The HBK-Undertaker match was so good, it seems like a strong possibility that HBK-Undertaker II will occur in Arizona. However, the Undertaker isn't planning to put up his Undefeated record at Wrestlemanias and his World Heavyweight (Smackdown brand) Title against a guy he just beat last year. He wants new competition. HBK has been showing signs of obsession wit getting a rematch, and his only option is winning the Royal Rumble. Standing in his way are... pretty much everyone.

So what will the WWE do? I know what I would do... Have Michaels be the LAST competitor eliminated, and have to find YET another way of getting his match with The Undertaker. Oh you want details? OK fine.
HBK is the last man eliminated from the Royal Rumble and his obsession grows. His last chance is to enter the Smackdown Elimination Chamber match at the February Pay-per-view (sometimes known as No Way Out, not sure what they'll call it this year) and win the World Heavyweight title there, forcing Undertaker to face him at Wrestlemania if he wants his belt back.

(A more "twist" filled version of the same story is as follows. Michaels attempts to enter the Smackdown Chamber match but is DENIED since he's on Raw. So he enters the Raw Chamber match, WINS the WWE Title, then sneaks into the ring and causes the Undertaker to get eliminated from the Smackdown chamber match and lose his title. Maybe he even uses Hornswaggle to distract Taker and the referee, allowing for some Sweet Chin Music and the 1-2-3 on the Undertaker. Batista or CM Punk is the beneficiary of the interference and takes on Royal Rumble winner John Cena for the World Heavyweight title at Mania. Triple H fights the other heel (Punk or Batista). I actually prefer this scenario, because it provides some heel heat for Michaels and even more for Batista/Punk...and hey, they could even have a backstage scene where we see Batista/Punk leaving the DX dressing room as HHH enters it, and HBK is acting funny - good ole foreshadowing. )

So, WM26 - Michaels and Undertakr yeah, they're fighting. Otherwise they would've already addressed the whole "I want a rematch" thing by now. I actually expected HBK to beat Undertaker at SummerSlam or Survivor Series to even it up.

As for HBK-Undertaker II the actual match... If i were book the show, I'd have the Undertaker beat up on Shawn for the first 15 minutes, then a ref bump, followed by Shawn Michaels beating the living crap out of 'Taker for the next 15 minutes straight. Multiple Chair shots, groin shots... everything he can heel up. Then I'd have Shawn deliver Sweet Chin Music 3 times in a row, and still not be able to get the pin. Then Undertaker would win and the show would be over.

Other fun matches that will be built up over the next two months include the "12 years in the making" battle between Bret Hart and Vincent Kennedy McMahon. Wrestling fans know the drill. 12 years ago, Bret Hart was WWE Champion. His contract was up in less than a month. Vince and the WWE were in a fight for their lives against WCW and Ted Turner's endless supply of money. Raw hadn't yet benefited from the Stone Cold Steve Austin / The Rock era (because it hadn't started yet) and Vince either didn't want to, or was unwilling to match the financial offer WCW had made to Bret. So Bret decided to leave. Vince said OK, but you need to drop the championship before u leave, as per tradition. He asked Bret to lose the belt in Montreal at the Survivor Series pay-per-view to Shawn Michaels. Bret preferred not to drop the belt in Canada and asked to lose the title at a house show later that week. Vince thought that was ridiculous (he was right) but Bret kept refusing. So he said "OK fine" and developed a plot now known as The Montreal Screwjob.

Vince instructed the matchmaker to insert a new part to the match. Bret Hart would lock Shawn in his trademark finisher "The Sharpshooter", and Shawn would reverse it. Referee Earl Hebner was told to then call for the bell AS IF Bret had submitted or tapped out. Bret knew nothing of it. Shawn did but denied that he knew for YEARS.

The resulting chaos has been replayed on WWE TV many times. Basically, Bret spazzed out in the middle of the ring. Spat on Vince (who at that time wasn't "out" as owner of the WWF. He was "just" an announcer). Made a big W-C-W with his hands to let the crowd know he was leaving. Total spaz out. He then went in the back and punched Vince slam in the face.

From then on, Vince and Shawn can't go to Canada without hearing chants of "you screwed Bret! you screwed Bret!" 12 years later. Same shit. Its kinda crazy.

What's REALLY crazy, is how that incident led to the explosion in popularity the WWF/WWE in the late 90s and early 2000s. Vince was a B or C as an annoucer, but he plays the EVIL BOSS to a tee. So well in fact, that its clear he's really like that in real life. He's a true bastard, and he played one on TV. That made for the perfect foil for the anti-establishment I-don't-give-a-fuck attitude of Stone Cold Steve Austin, the biggest mega-star the WWF had seen since Hulk Hogan. Later, Vince would feud with The Rock, Triple H, Degeneration X, and his son Shane. None of that would've been possible if not for the Montreal Screwjob. Perhaps Vince would've found a way to get on TV at some point, but who knows when that would've been.

So with all that history and weight behind it, the Bret Vince match is going to be a pretty big deal. Expect interference, shenanigans, and hopefully a more in shape Bret Hart than we saw as guest host on the January 4th edition of Raw.

Let's see, what else?
Well, John Cena, Triple H, Batista, Rey Mysterio, Chris Jericho, The Big Show, Randy Orton and CM Punk are all still out there. As are Kofi Kingston, MVP, and The Miz.

Randy Orton and Legacy have been together long enough. Very soon, they are going to break up and DiBiase is going to be the one to stand up to Orton. I see this happening in one of a few ways. Orton takes on Sheamus at the Royal Rumble for the WWE title. He could win, and then order DiBiase and Rhodes to help him defend it at the Elimination Chamber event. When they fail (or more specifically, when DiBiase REFUSES to help), things will boil over and a big match for Wrestlemania will be set. Another route would be for Orton to NOT beat Sheamus, and NOT win the Elimination Chamber, and then make one final, last ditch attempt to use Legacy to get him the title (shot) he seeks by entering all 3 members into the Money-In-The-Bank Ladder Match, where the winner gets a guaranteed title shot at any point up until the next Wreslemania.

DiBiase would either win the M-I-T-B himself, or refuse to help Orton, and the split would be imminent. I don't really see any other options for Orton since he finished off his feud with Kofi Kingston so soon. Actually, it was a little too soon unless they had something else planned (like what I just typed out).

CM Punk and his Straight Edge Society have natural feuds with DX and John Cena. Based on Batista's "seniority" on the card and age (CM Punk has a lot of great heel years ahead of him), I see Batista being the heel in the 2nd Main Event instead of CM Punk. I'm not saying I agree with that, or disagree with it, but that's how I see the politics working out. Punk should still be the Smackdown World Heavyweight champion based on his work from last summer, but the politics have the belt on The Undertaker.

The WWE is blessed with some great heels right now. Jericho, Batista, Orton, CM Punk , The Miz, Maryse, Michelle McCool and Edge (when he comes back and turns heel after 6 months as a face) do EXCELLENT heel work. So much so that the heel turn so many hope John Cena embarks on (he was a good heel when he rapped...a damn good heel) may not happen for another year or three. In fact, they are going to have to start elevating some more faces. HHH HBK Cena Undertaker and Rey Mysterio will need backup from someone like Kofi Kingston, MVP, or John Morrison.

Until then, Triple H will still be on the top of the card. He's either going to win the Royal Rumble and fight Batista, or not win and fight CM Punk.

Here's the Wrestlemania line up I'm expecting to see.


Wrestlemania 26 - Glendale, AZ - March 28th, 2010

Shawn Michaels* vs The Undertaker for The World Heavyweight Championship

Batista* vs John Cena for the WWE Title

Bret "Hitman" Hart vs Mr McMahon

Rey Mysterio vs CM Punk

Randy Orton vs Ted DiBiase Jr

The Miz* vs MVP vs Mark Henry for the US Title

Drew McIntyre* vs John Morrison for the Intercontinental Title

Money In The Bank - Sheamus v Jericho v Kingston v R-Truth v
Evan Bourne v Rey Mysterio v Cody Rhodes v The Big Show v Santino Marella

Beth Phoenix vs Mickie James for the Women's Championship
Maryse vs Melina for the Diva's Championship

ROYAL RUMBLE UPDATE!!!

Edge(!) returned and won(!!!) the Royal Rumble tonight. So I'm adjusting my projected card. I now see HBK costing Undertaker his title in the Smackdown Elimination Chamber, and Jericho winning it. That leads me to an intriguing possibility... HBK eliminated HHH from the Rumble and Hunter doesn't have a natural Mania feud this year. Perhaps a DX-Taker triple threat? That's kind of a bastardization of doing Michaels-Taker 2, but I can see it happening. I'd rather see HHH in a triple threat with Cena and Batista though.

WWE Title - Shawn Michaels* vs The Undertaker
Bret Hart and John Cena vs Vince Mchahon and Batista
World Heavyweight Title - Chris Jericho* vs Edge
CM Punk vs HHH
Randy Orton vs Ted DiBiase vs Cody Rhodes
Women's Title - Mickie James* vs Beth Phoenix
Money in the Bank Ladder Match - John Morrison, Kofi Kingston, Rey Mysterio, MVP, Big Show, Kane, Sheamus, TheMiz, Shelton Benjamin
Intercontinental Title - Drew McIntyre* vs R Truth
ECW Title - Christain* vs William Regal